[ it is okay. at least it is if keith really does know that shiro wouldn't have pushed him away or judged him for something as arbitrary as the blood in his veins. that's not something keith has chosen, but his actions every day since shiro's met him, those are his choices and they make him into the man shiro knows. as long as keith knows that, shiro thinks it's okay.
after a moment's hesitation, he turns his hand underneath keith's, curling his fingers loosely around his. ]
Where you've come from matters to you. It doesn't have to stop mattering, you know.
[Doing things in his own way, on his own terms; it's something he's always done, even amid these tender moments with Shiro -- the whole team, really. It's a work in progress. Slowly but surely, one day he'll have it all figured out.
And still, with him, it's all or nothing. It's easy for him to obsess over something he can't control; obsess over the idea, possible outcomes, maybe a solution. Just setting all of it aside and focusing on the present, he thought that'd be the best, most viable option. His past should open up, it slowly has through their journey. Putting it all aside for now, until it bears some relevancy again...
It made perfect sense.]
It's still important, it's just -- not right now.
[The lattermost of that said in a quieter tone, without any real conviction. His hand sits idle in Shiro's, thoroughly distracted.]
[ there's nothing wrong as such with doing things on your own terms, but in a team, sometimes compromise is required. sometimes, they can achieve a lot more together than apart. this isn't about teamwork, though, and it's only incidentally about keith's tendency toward loner-hood. so long as he trusts shiro despite those tendencies, so long as he doesn't harbour some notion that shiro might be prejudiced about him now or care less than he did before, shiro doesn't mind. ]
When did you get so mature?
[ the question is the gentlest of jokes, of teases. ]
[Nothing's changed, especially not with Shiro. He's managed to make a small problem much biggeer in his head. Allura might have had her qualms, and while that was a little unfair, he gets it. Of anyone, Shiro's the last person he has to worry about.
Which is entirely asinine; if anyone, Shiro would be most fearful, if not somewhere around Allura's level of uncertain -- for all he's been through and nothing else. Keith hasn't felt any different since officially being inducted as a Galran hybrid. Occasionally, he still worries that he might change, might develop weird tendencies..but as long as he's attentive and actively concerned, that sort of thing can't just sneak up on him or anyone else.
There's a sigh in response to that comment; it'd be a compliment if he were five, probably. He's smiling ever-so-slightly, though, if not belatedly.]
I'm being serious. [Without trying to reel him in or put a second layer of awkwardness on the mood.] If it matters so much, I'll figure it out. There's plenty of time.
[For something he was prepared to die over, he's being pretty meh now. It took as much to get him here.]
[ galra have done terrible things to shiro. even if he doesn't remember most of them, he remembers enough to know that much — but keith would never do anything like that, not to him and not to anyone else. of course he isn't afraid of keith. he knows keith. ]
So am I. [ keith has always been hot-headed, temperamental. this level of introspection and wisdom isn't something shiro's entirely used to seeing in him. still: it's a good change, something he doesn't mind seeing. part of him might wish that keith didn't have to deal with these things, but he also sees keith's potential, how good a leader he could be some day, how smart he is. ]
[It's a sign of the times, maybe. Jumping headfirst into everything is still a skill he possesses but, certain things require a bit more..than...that. He's learning, at any rate just barely.]
...Anyway, [He finds himself looking off to the side; he hadn't been maintaining eye contact very well in the first place.] it's not your fault.
[Just to reel it back in to the original point -- something that's also a nonfactor. He's firm in not really holding anyone accountable for their reaction to his Galran ties. Shiro least of all.
no subject
after a moment's hesitation, he turns his hand underneath keith's, curling his fingers loosely around his. ]
Where you've come from matters to you. It doesn't have to stop mattering, you know.
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And still, with him, it's all or nothing. It's easy for him to obsess over something he can't control; obsess over the idea, possible outcomes, maybe a solution. Just setting all of it aside and focusing on the present, he thought that'd be the best, most viable option. His past should open up, it slowly has through their journey. Putting it all aside for now, until it bears some relevancy again...
It made perfect sense.]
It's still important, it's just -- not right now.
[The lattermost of that said in a quieter tone, without any real conviction. His hand sits idle in Shiro's, thoroughly distracted.]
no subject
When did you get so mature?
[ the question is the gentlest of jokes, of teases. ]
no subject
Which is entirely asinine; if anyone, Shiro would be most fearful, if not somewhere around Allura's level of uncertain -- for all he's been through and nothing else. Keith hasn't felt any different since officially being inducted as a Galran hybrid. Occasionally, he still worries that he might change, might develop weird tendencies..but as long as he's attentive and actively concerned, that sort of thing can't just sneak up on him or anyone else.
There's a sigh in response to that comment; it'd be a compliment if he were five, probably. He's smiling ever-so-slightly, though, if not belatedly.]
I'm being serious. [Without trying to reel him in or put a second layer of awkwardness on the mood.] If it matters so much, I'll figure it out. There's plenty of time.
[For something he was prepared to die over, he's being pretty meh now. It took as much to get him here.]
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So am I. [ keith has always been hot-headed, temperamental. this level of introspection and wisdom isn't something shiro's entirely used to seeing in him. still: it's a good change, something he doesn't mind seeing. part of him might wish that keith didn't have to deal with these things, but he also sees keith's potential, how good a leader he could be some day, how smart he is. ]
2wks after p5 hell and regular hell-
...Anyway, [He finds himself looking off to the side; he hadn't been maintaining eye contact very well in the first place.] it's not your fault.
[Just to reel it back in to the original point -- something that's also a nonfactor. He's firm in not really holding anyone accountable for their reaction to his Galran ties. Shiro least of all.
Talk about being biased.]